Overcoming Judgment…Why we fear judgment and ways to overcome it. ~

Did you know that we can learn to be immune to judgment and overcome the world? Yes…in fact, we were taught how to do this more than 2,000 years ago, yet we’re not doing it. The fear of being judged…as if we’re not good enough, is one of the many symptoms we experience when we “believe” what’s said. It’s all coming from our false beliefs generated in thought…in the mind.  

Naturally, we all want love & acceptance. It’s rooted in our very survival. So, when we build and maintain positive relationships, we often find it challenging to step out of the norm to pave our own path. Perhaps it’s challenging because we fear rejection of not ever being good enough.

So, let’s begin by taking a moment to explore our fear of being judged and how we can overcome it for good.

If you’ve been following my blogs, read my book, or you’ve been doing inner work, you probably already know that all problems are created in our mind. Judgment is one of many problems we face when we believe our thoughts. These are the same thoughts that create the negative emotions we feel inside.

We also know that 98% of our thoughts are random, repetitive, and unproductive. Today’s thoughts are the same yesterday as well as what will come tomorrow. If it’s not challenging enough to believe our own thoughts, what’s worse is believing other people’s thoughts. All these thoughts are coming from the ego. This is what the ego does to survive. It feeds itself with distraction by getting our attention.

When we listen to our thoughts, that is, the voice of fear & doubt and believe them, we give thoughts power to grow. At some point, we come to believe we are our thoughts. Yes, we take on the identity of the resources we’ve been given and think we’re the ego. Yet, when we’re clear on who we are…there’s no reason to fear judgment.

It’s important to realize that when our identity gets mixed up with the ego and our thoughts, it’s like we’re trapped in a box…a “person” like mind box. And at times, it may even seem like a prison. The truth is…this is not the life intended for us. Instead, we’ve been called to a higher place.

Know this for sure…no one or no-thing can keep you confined in this mind box, except you.

However, if you’re happy being confined to a box, then so be it. But if you’re someone seeking something better for yourself, you can start breaking out of this box right now. Before you know it, you’ll discover you are free. And once you reclaim your freedom, you will live in our natural state of inner peace and joy from now on.

Self-critical thoughts of judgment are not facts; they’re simply ideas that you’ve been conditioned to allow and believe. You’ve been watering these seeds and they’re so rooted in you now that it’s become a habit.

I don’t know about you, but once I realized I was stuck in this psychological box and I was free to get out, I was determined to figure out how to get out no matter what. So, what about you?

Isn’t it’s time to end this ego nonsense for good?

We can reclaim our authority over our attention and these disturbing thoughts of judgment. Yet, we must be willing to stay in a neutral position by “not minding” what the ego says no matter what happens.

Once we recognize we are not our thoughts—we are simply the observer of our thoughts—we will begin to notice a change in the way we think. We’re then able to consciously choose which thoughts we want to give our attention to or not. This is the authority we already have but haven’t been using. Realize, when we become distracted and give thoughts our attention, we lose our presence in the moment because we’ve chosen to follow the thoughts that tempt us.

Always remember, it’s a choice. Our interest tempted us, and we went along.  

The truth is…we are already free; we’re just not aware we’re free. Yes, we’re free to say no and end this inner judgment for good because we were given the authority long ago. The ego can’t live without us, but we can live with it. Notice, all the problems and judgments come from this inner critic in hopes of distracting us from our true freedom.    

Regardless of our life situation or how we behave, the ego will always judge us. So, at the end of the day, we’ve got to care more about our purpose here and ourselves…than what the ego says or the opinions of people (most of which we don’t even know).

Let’s face it. We must be willing to invest in what matters most. We must be willing to stand up for it by “not minding” what makes no difference anyway. This is how we move closer to the truth, our truth.   

So, you might be asking…How can I get over the fear of being judged? 

Let’s start with observing and exposing the judgment. Taking time to be quiet or a time of meditation gives us the opportunity to watch the ego and what it’s saying. This is how we can be more aware of what’s going on in our head. It raises our awareness of the inner voice so we can shine a light on it and make the changes needed to reclaim our rightful authority.

This practice helps us become more mindful. Remember, mindfulness is simply our ability to recognize our thoughts before we engage in them…thus eliminating the need to disengage since we haven’t engaged in the first place. Know that the problem is never the situation we face, but rather our thoughts about the situation.

When we learn how to recognize the ego’s tricks and not believe or “mind” the thoughts the ego creates, we also end the negative effects the ego has on us (i.e., inner critic, ego, voice of fear). Yes, we are then free from what is holding us back from achieving our highest potential as well as finding the contentment and inner peace in life we’ve been seeking all along. 

Most importantly, remember that judgments are not a threat, nor is the ego. Believing them & identifying is the problem. Again, it’s a choice.

Now, just imagine: What would your life be like without that negative voice inside you?

Ways to Overcome Fear of Judgment

• Recognize the resistance in your mind, emotions, & body.
• Know that the resistance is not you.
• Practice allowing the judgments to be neutral by seeing them as your teacher & not minding.
• Listen to the judgments & know it’s old pain energy that needs to be released.
• Have compassion yet stay firm in your authority.
• Write the judgments down in a journal to expose them.
• Consider using meditation &/or yoga to help reveal what’s hidden for your inquiry work.
• Watch what’s going on in your normal behavior…in the 5Rs1.
• (1. Resist 2. Reflect 3. React 4. Result 5. Reach) Refer to an earlier blog for 5Rs1 & 5Rs2 at:  https://breakingfreeboundaries.com/are-your-cravings-becoming-addictive/
• Use the 5Rs2 of new behavior to make the change needed to release it.
• (1. Recognize 2. Re-Open 3. Relax 4. Release 5. Rise above)
• Be patient with yourself to nurture the growth you want to see in yourself and in the world.

I hope you’ve enjoyed this blog. Please share it with someone else. It may be exactly what they need to hear to be free too. Come back for next month’s blog and…

Be sure to check out the helpful links below for the author’s book, monthly newsletter, website, earlier blogs, and other opportunities. 

About the Author – Trina Carroll-Houk is a spiritual teacher, counselor, and founder of Breaking Free Boundaries, LLC who specializes in self-awareness, mindfulness, and the spiritual dimension of being. Her goal is to help people improve their quality of life so they can experience inner peace, meaningful purpose, and fulfillment. Trina represents a movement focused on helping people release what limits them from transforming into awakened beings with a higher sense of spiritual consciousness.

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